Egg Procurement and the Gift of Life - B'nai B'rith International

Egg Procurement and the Gift of Life
By Janet Lubman Rathner

Unable to become pregnant a second time, Ruth Tavor, who had put off having children until well into her forties while she pursued a career in opera, chose the donor-egg route over adoption.

“It’s because of the bond. Carrying [a baby] inside you is completely different,” says Tavor. “Plus, you have more control. Somebody who [gave] up their child [for adoption]—how did she treat her pregnancy?”

Egg donor waiting lists are long, particularly if there are caveats, and Tavor, an Israeli expatriate living in New York, had one: She wanted the egg to come from a Jewish woman.

“It was nothing about the baby. It was just a level of comfort. I [had] to like the [donor]. I felt more connection to one who was Jewish,” Tavor says.

But just as they typically do not give up their children for adoption, Jewish women—at least American ones—are not inclined to donate their eggs. Tavor concluded that if she wanted a Jewish donor, she might as well focus on Israel. This prompted Tavor and her website designer husband, David Fogel, to take out an ad in an Israeli newspaper.

The flood of responses led not only to the desired second child, but also to a new vocation for Tavor: Jewish/Israeli egg procurement specialist.

At the request of her doctors, who were impressed with the number of Jewish donors she had so readily assembled—a success she attributes to the comfort elicited by her Israeli surname—Tavor opened NY Lifespring LLC in 2002. Today she is aligned with about a dozen fertility clinics up and down the East Coast, as well as in Los Angeles.

Her specialty: finding Israeli women between the ages of 21 and 32 willing to anonymously give the gift of pregnancy to infertile women.

“Israelis are very responsible and very compassionate. They get how important this is,” says Tavor, explaining why she recruits solely from her home country. “It’s a big mystery that I’ve never figured out—why Jewish women here don’t donate.”

Not Unique

Tavor’s desire for a Jewish link with the donor egg is not unique. Her clientele—primarily referrals from fertility clinics—hails from all over the United States as well as abroad.

“People come here and they’re almost self-conscious. They apologize sometimes that they care. [But] if you feel more of a connection and it’s accessible, why not? You’re going through enough,” Tavor says.

Tavor charges a commission of between $4,000 and $5,000. Each egg donor receives a compensation of $8,000. As prep and retrieval take place at the designated fertility clinics, clients also cover the donors’ travel expenses. But Tavor, whose screening process includes questions about what compels a woman to become a donor, says money is not the motivator.

“Doing a good deed…is among their most frequently listed reasons for doing this,” she says.

Tavor offered the below letter from a new parent as proof of the mitzvah:

“The happiness is indescribable…Where there was no other life, the house is filled with the sounds of crying, laughing, cooing, and, as the baby grows, the happy chaos of toys all over the place; giggling, screaming, and always smiling. The toddler is already speaking words, saying ‘Mommy,’ and ‘Papa,’ and looking up at Daddy and falling asleep on his soft tummy in the evening. That is the stage we are at and hoping to enjoy every step in the future. And you helped.”

According to Tavor, “[Donors] leave a path of light behind them that makes you proud to be part of it. They have the power to make a huge difference in someone’s life and they choose to do it.”